Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Randomize
