In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
this hospital has no fireball
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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