Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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