We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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