I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize
