i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
