College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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