you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
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