are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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