you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Randomize