it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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