I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
MIDGETS
????
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize