dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
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