it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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