no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
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