I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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