if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
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