i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize