In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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