I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
