I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
My hand turned me down
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize