They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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