are you still at the devil's house?
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
