I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
