So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
