I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
I touched a dick in church today
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
