Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
