Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
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