so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
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