Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
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