But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
I am spending my child support on dildos
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
