another moral hangover. fuck.
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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