Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
