i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize