Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize