It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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