Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
