Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
She bit a glass in half.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Randomize
