ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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