The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
