he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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