I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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