you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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