I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
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