So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
