Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
