i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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