anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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