hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize