5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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