I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize
